No Regret, Not This Time

help me fight through nothingness of this life

i dont want to cry, but im about to cry now

i remember to my mom who are getting older

she is so far away from me today

we are in different state

just wishing that god will take a good care of my mother

and give me a time to repay all her kindness.. 

i realize my mistake when i was taking care of my father when he is alive,
i was impatient

sometimes i yell at him even saying bad word to him

now

how i wish i can turned back time and understand my father?

how i wish i can turned back time so i can make thing better from worst!

i cried realizing that i wasnt a good son at all. 

is not about feeling anymore, 

im thinking that it was too late for me to treasure the person that raise me and made me who and what i am now! 

yeah! i know that sorry is wasnt enough

but "maafkan aku wahai ibu dan ayah"

i didnt event want to finish this entry i just wanted to run and hug my mom, 

i feel like such a terrible person.